Monday, April 8, 2013

Cup a coffee, yea!


After being reminded of this absolute masterpiece the other day, I kept thinking about famous athletes and their love for cocaine.  Diego Maradona, Mike Tyson, Shawn Kemp, Martina Hingis, Gary O'connor, Dwight Gooden, Daryl Strawberry, Tim Raines, Dexter Manley, Steve Howe, Lawrence Taylor, and of course, the entire 1990's Dallas Cowboys.

Naturally these athletes enjoyed varied levels of success during their pro careers. The above list is much longer in reality, and would stretch on for days if we included users of amphetamine, especially in baseball.  Mike Schmidt, Hank Aaron, and many other hall of famers are on record acknowledging their use of amphetamine, and the rampant use throughout baseball before, during, and after their time as players.  If you want the ability to play 162 games in 180 days it only makes sense you may need a little "pick me up" from time to time, All The Time! Just ask The Macho Man.  Professional Wrestling is the only "sport" that can boast a more grueling schedule than baseball.

I put together a  list of sports figures that should have, or should start snorting EVERYTHING.  If The Macho Man can produce such quality puddin, more sports figures can too.

1. Tim Duncan. 
 The big fundamental is a no brainer! Look at this unemotional bump on a log.   

2. Rajon Rondo. 
 This guy already looks like an alien, let's add some methamphetamine! 

3. Pablo Sandoval. 
 He might actually think he is a kung fu panda. 

4. Adam Dunn. 
 I just want to watch the 6'6 giant sprint to first after all 106 of his walks in 2013. 

5. Bill Belichick. 
 I just want to see his heart explode on national television. 

6. Jim Harbaugh. 
Why? See #5 

7. Lance Armstrong. 
Why not?  He has taken everything else! 

8. Iman Shumpert. 
 Nothings says crack/cocaine like a new jack city flat top. 

9. Harry Caray.  
Holy Cow!

No comments:

Post a Comment